All of my ramblings on one site
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All the stars on your ceiling, they glow
but not for you Michelle.
You most likely won't read this, so here it goes. As you know, I can't smoke weed. And also as you know, I like weed. I won't deny that. But you are obsessed with it. Obsessed! And it really irks me. It seems to me like that's all you've become, is some druggy who doesn't care about anything but weed. Pills, even. Sure I may be a bit jealous that I can't smoke ever again in my entire life and you get to do it every day of your whole life, but that's not what this is about. You've been my very best friend for about a year and a half now. Sure seems longer though, doesn't it? Like I've known you my entire life. You know just about damn near every single thing about me. You are a great friend, despite what everyone else thinks. I love you to death. Til death do us part, all the way. The whole point of this is, today I sat on the bus just thinking about you and Jarrod, and I seriously just started flat out crying. I've never done that before with anyone. Jarrod, all of this especially goes to you, too. And hell, I've known you even longer. Sixth grade? You were my best friend, and one of the most important people in my whole life. Why does it feel like neither of you give two shits about anything anymore? I hate to see you both fucking up so much. I want more than anything to pull you both out of this shit, but I don't have the power to do it. Only you do. But I'm not going to tell you how to live. I mean, shit, you can smoke weed every single day whenever you want to, you go to a school that doesn't give a shit. By all means, take advantage of your freedom all you can before you have to give up your life to a dull corperation. Not even just that. Put education aside, what if you guys went to jail, or ended up even fucking dying? Now I'm getting dramatic, I know, but anything could happen. The jist of all of this is that I really seriously care about both of you so much, you're two out of like..four people I care about most. And I hate that I have to work every.single.day. of every single fucking weekend, and it really limits when I can see you guys. And I'm not allowed to take off work for a whole month or something, but after that month, I'm going to reserve a weekend just for you guys, because I hate this. But what I fear most about that is, all you'll do is smoke weed that entire time. And Jarrod won't even be there. Sometimes I wonder if I should just give up on you both. You really don't seem to care enough as to put down your bong for a night because I'm there. If I could smoke, this wouldn't be a problem. But it is. See how much weed is ruining us? You probably wouldn't. As for Ashely and Kassie,
you're both probably the shittiest friends I've ever had. You're the most fun to be with, I'm not gonna lie, but when it comes down to the real meaning of a friend.. you're not even close. You're both so fucking fake and egocentric that I hate going to my moms now. What would you think is ruining us? Well you probably couldn't take a wild guess either. Weed. I've ALWAYS always been there for you guys when you needed me. I've risked so much to keep your stupid asses out of trouble. And what's so sad about it is, I wouldn't see you doing that for me. Leaving me to go smoke weed? What great friends you guys are.
4:00 p.m. - 2010-03-01
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The past the present, and the future
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